So I have shared all the tawdry details of my love of turquoise and plum coloured eyeliner, but let’s face it – nothing motives you to take your body back more than being squeezed into a designer frock by a long-suffering sales person eager for a commission.
IN FACT, when you espy yourself in the mirror and you
immediately notice all the lumpy parts that need attention you’ll be instantly
cured of take-out and beer by the gallon.
It shames me to show you some half-hidden evidence. Too much info will scar you for life here:
 |
| Oh dear... |
This is what happened to me this week. I was almost
instantly cured. I have exercised daily since squeezing into this frock AND my
lips have not seen a sneaky calorie that my body does not ABSOLUTELY require to
function.
So here I am blogging about it with aching arms and a
grumbling stomach but it WILL all be worth it.
Because this is a pseudo-foodie blog, here goes my first tip
for a low fat recipe:
Firstly, throw out every morsel of tasty food you own – even
if it’s low-fat and delicious (yes such a beast exists) you’ll be tempted to
over-eat if it tastes too good.
Boil a chicken breast with some salt and herbs;
Boil some brown rice;
Steam some vegetables;
Wipe the tears off your face and eat your bloody dinner!
There are children in Africa who are starving.
(Like me, a sort of a child in Africa
undergoing a bout of self-induced hunger. Note: I am not trying to sound
unsympathetic, I blame low blood sugar.)
Now, just so that you know, I am not aiming to resemble a
severe-looking model like those in the frock catalogues. Those girls look
unhealthy and probably weigh as much as a malnourished kitten. When you can
drape a full-grown woman head-to-knee in a large-sized tank top and her skin is
transparent from lack of lustre something just screams toxic to me. The thing
is, malnourished model ladies: we can all eat platefuls of chemicals and never
sleep and have crisp hair and pray to all the gods that the graphics guy can
photoshop you enough to look like you are vital once the deed is done.
But I digress. Over the last three years I have gained
around one and a half a dress size due to a knee-injury, a fondness for sitting
on my rear and reading novels and of course, cooking. Cooking and eating out, a
lot. Daily even, sometimes.
So here I am, on the cusp of things, ready to free-weight, static
cycle, swim and ride and Special K my way to a healthier self. I’ll walk for
breast cancer, starving children, education, saving the rhinos – you name it.
Now, if I can just get off the couch…
